Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?"  8/10/2007 01:32

Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time you need him, chances are you won't be needing him again.  8/9/2007 07:12

If it were not for Thomas Edison, we would all be watching television in the dark.  8/9/2007 01:11

If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.  8/8/2007 20:08

There are three sides to any argument: your side, my side and the right side.  By Randy - 8/8/2007 02:29

Death is hereditary.  8/8/2007 01:28

Conscience and reputation are two things. Conscience is due to yourself, reputation to your neighbor. [Saint Augustine]  8/7/2007 09:13

I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.  8/7/2007 05:02

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.  8/7/2007 02:37

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?  8/7/2007 00:59